3/22/2022
When you just start to think things are changing for the better, here comes the reoccurring thought of, "will I ever be able", or "is there another way?". Sometimes I think to myself, how do I truly amount to my goals, and are they even reachable? I consider that in many instances where my mind is saying one thing, but my body says otherwise.
I have been reading this book recently called "The Body Keeps the Score" by Besser van der Kolk, and it has opened up my mind to the notion that I may be holding on to certain traumas within my body. Even though they do not effect my mindset, ability to progress, or my self-confidence or esteem. I still do tremendously feel as though some of the habits I struggle with keeping up with are most physical objectives.
When I just get into a rhythm of finding a routine my body rejects it almost instantly. Most times I blame my parents, and other times I blame outside sources for not committing to things, other times I completely blame myself and my laziness. When in part, it was mostly because I have not dealt with certain traumas that cause me to withdrawal from anything uncomfortable to me. Deep breathe, remind your self of the goal you are aiming to reach, and keep moving. Big or Small.
